Doing my own head in

I am doing my own head in right now I cannot stick to plan for more than a few days before I start on sabotaging myself. I know it works, I know all the pros and cons yet my brain goes mad and decides that it wants food that ultimately just gets me fatter. 

I am beginning to wonder if the only way I will fully get to grips with staying on the wagon is to have a scare of some sort not a road I want to go down. So yet again after another few days of eating rubbish I have drawn the line and will try focusing on the mini goals like the 6 mile wag walk me Liz Doug and Dudley are signing up for at the end of April. The walk will be much easier with some weight off!

On to today, I had the day off work and managed to have a rare lie in. I dropped Rich off at work and then set about the busy task of doing very little...which didn't last long as I decided to first tidy up the freezer then stock it up with some more soup. I managed to make two batches and sort out tonight's dinner whilst entertaining Doug with my singing and dancing (or not as he growled at me then walked off). The rest of the afternoon was spent walking Doug, enjoying a nice bubble bath and watching The Good Wife. This evening we watched another episode of Sherlock.

Food wise I have enjoyed being on the wagon today

Rice pudding with yogurt stirred in and fruit.

Two quorn sticky fillets (free) two McCain smiles (1 syn) with a butter bud (0.5) hex of cheese and salad

Mid afternoon snack of a muller light with a nana and green tea

Moussaka with 2x hex of cheese and a huge salad too. It was a huge portion but was gorgeous.

Pudding muller pudding (5) plus two bubbly bites (6) taking my total too 12.5 for the day.

I don't expect a good result at weigh in tomorrow but at least I am back on the wagon. I will leave you with this picture of Doug from the weekend. He was really enjoying his beach walk.

A special kind of day

Some days I am really special....I do things that are just a bit dumb. Now I know what your all thinking Karen your special all the time (and not in the dumb way) but today I was amazed by how silly I can be. The first example of my silliness was spending several hours doing a report to realise I had done it wrong...because I completely forgot to select the right data. I guess at least I got to practice formatting and v lookups....

The second example came at lunch when I sat down to enjoy my lunch and went to start eating without my spoon. I remember getting my spoon out of my locker yet I managed to leave this on my desk and attempted to eat like a cavegirl. Luckily I spared myself much embarrassment by wandering back to my desk to find it. 

Apart from my dimwittedness it's been a good day I managed to run three reports today and get them looking right which I am quite chuffed with as I do find excel mind boggling! Since we got home from work its been the usual walking Doug, sorting tomorrows food and dinner for tonight. The rest of the evening was taken watching Arsenal and swearing a lot.

Food wise it's be yummy on plan and well yummy

Go on guess the breakfast....yep dorset simply fruity muesli (HEB) with fruit and yogurt

Mid morning wine

Freezer fine leftover balsamic quorn lamb with pasta and topped with feta (HEA)

Diet Ginger beer quorn chicken (same as diet coke chicken but with ginger beer) noodles and stir fried veg

Yoomoo yogurt (8 syns) 2 tsp of chocolate sauce (2) and my final HEB

I am soon going to be heading to bed to sulk over the football...really hate losing :(

Night night all x0x0

Searching for my mojo

My mojo has seemed well and truly broken since Friday. Usual combination of tiredness plus feeling low meant reaching for the rubbish instead of the stuff that I know will make me feel better inside. Yet my brain does not compute with this and instead I am like the human dustbin. If someone can explain why I have gone from being miss focus to miss shovelfooddownmygullet I will be happy to hear it. 

I had a chat with Mitchymoo last night and it was good to chat about struggling on the plan. The thing is I know slimming world is fab I know the food I make is gorgeous and the junk food won't make my mood better yet I still have it. I am just going to have to keep doing a stern face at my silly brain until it gets to grips with not sending me off the wagon. 

So today I got myself back on the sparkly purple bus full of unicorns (and unikitty's)

Today has been a good day busy but good...I had an induction thingum this morning which came with coffee...this always makes me happy! I also had bank duty today which meant a trek down and up a steepish hill (honestly it is). I didn't even die on the way back up the hill....though I know you think this is obvious as I am writing this blog but you never know ghosts can type! Well those that have hands can..

Once we got home it was the usual Doug walk prepping food for tomorrow then sitting down doing very little as Rich offered to cook. I am going to spend the evening watching Supersize vs Superskinny which always helps my brain focus....sometimes shock tactics work on me!

Food wise it looked a bit like this

Overnight oats (HEB) with berries and yogurt.

Broccoli spinach and laughing cow blue cheese triangles (3 syns) with fruit

Tagliatelle with veg and quorn sausages and a tub of low low (HEA and HEB) expertly cooked by Rich

Muller dessert (5) and special k biscuit moments (5) taking me total too 15 for the day as I used 2 syns on semi skimmed milk in my training coffees.

And on that note I am going to finish scarying myself over supersize vs superskinny and leave you with this message

It's so close I can smell it

The weekend is nearly here once pesky Thursday is out of the way it's finally Friday and the weekend!!! But first I had to get through Thursday. The day went well I woke up in rather a lot of pain as we had a furry visitor in the bed  and he managed to take most of my room. Seriously how can someone so small take up so much room!!

Apart from that today has been a standard day, I learnt more stuff and resisted chocolate cake. I realised too that food is ever present at work when at lunchtime the local pub brought samples for us all too try...I was already sorting my soup out so resisted but it smelt very good! I was tempted by the ratatouille or mac and cheese. Tomorrow there is a buffet lunch thing which I may have to resist. I've prepped my lunch so I certainly won't go hungry. 

This evening has been very sedate, I've chatted to my beautiful Mitchy who is going through a rough time right now so just wanted to say hugs love you sweetie and watched a bit of TV. I plan to head to bed soon as I am really tired as normal and I really want to read my book.

Food wise I have used the max syns today but enjoyed every morsal

Porridge oats soaked in yogurt overnight (HEB) with fruit.

Usual morning grape snack

Curried  veg soup fruit and babybels

Chuck everything on the plate dinner HEB bread with flora lighter than light (1) quorn nuggets (4) quorn burgers (1) sw chips beans and shrooms.. It was gorgeous and I really enjoyed it.

The rest of my syns on a bubbly bite (3) and fish n chips (6)

Thats all for tonight two days on the trot I'm doing good here haha

A leopard trying to change their spots

So after Vintage Thursday I did plan to blog daily and stay on track neither of which has happened...I am not so good at this wagon sitting. I was all fired up and then what happens...something happens and I fall of track. Lets go back to Friday first on this whistle stop tour of the past week so you are all caught up.

Friday was a good day food wise and all on plan until dinner when I went out with the girls to Jamie's Italian and had a gorgeous dinner and catch up. I planned to have a flexi meal and enjoy my choices and hanging out with the girls it was a lovely evening.

Saturday I had planned a lazy day with only energy expelled watching the football....which I have now erased from my memory as it was a horrible painful match to watch. Again I stayed on plan throughout the day but when the evening hit I descended into raiding the chocolate and freezer and anything I fancied. I have no justification for this either and this was the catalyst for Sunday.

On Sunday I started well with a SW fry up but then the devil hit

I decided in a petulant manner that I was going to have whatever I wanted and pretty much spent the day munching away on rubbish. By Monday I was in the mode of I can't be bothered to get back on plan I am grumpy so I will have whatever I want and then the day descended into rubbishness. Something happened at work which upset me and for some reason when I get upset I just eat even more rubbish. It really doesn't help in the long run but when I am in the food bubble I feel temporarily better. The thing is it cannot carry on not just because I want to look nice on my wedding day but health wise. 

I could have quite easily skipped weigh in yesterday but decided I really needed to go and see how bad the damage was. I put on 4.5lbs which could have been worse but group was good and supportive as was our lovely consultant. It was the couple of the year and I was nominated along with my two amazing friends Jen and Tracy (threesome of the year haha) we didn't win but it was fab to be nominated and explain why we are supportive of each other. It's amazing having two friends who are on the same journey as you and understanding when your struggling at the same group. 

I woke up this morning promising myself I was going to get sorted and get my butt back on the wagon. I've planned my meals for the week ahead nothing too fancy just nice simple food that is on plan and take one meal as it comes. I also need to find a way of helping my moods instead of feeding them junk. Those who follow my blog will know I struggle with depression 99.9% of the time I am absolutely fine but then it hits me like a freight train and I need to learn how to deal with it better. Maybe I should start knitting....though that looks hard!

Today has been a good work day busy but good...we did spend some time looking at the lampposts that seemed to be swaying as the weather is pretty awful. I did manage a walk with Doug without losing him to the wind though he was not amused as the wind was making his ears flap more than normal. This evening whilst waiting for Rich to finish work we have just relaxed and watched the buildup to the Arsenal game tonight. Doug also helped me prep dinner tonight.

He is waiting for me to drop cheese I think...

Food wise its been on plan which is good for me

Dorset simply fruity muesli with fruit and yogurt and the first of many coffees (using HEA of milk)

More coffee and wine before it ferments and has to be eaten in the pure form

Mushy pea curry and orzo and orange things

Snacks when I got home from work special k chewy bar (4.5 thanks donna for recommending them :x) and a danio (3)

Mahoosive pasta bake with two healthy extras of cheese with a homemade tomato sauce.

Snickers in a cup made with 20g of peanut hottie (4 syns) and 2 tsps of choc shot (1 syn) taking me to 12.5 for the day.





And that's me caught up for today I am going to enjoy the last few minutes of the game (now I know the score and know that we didn't lose!) night night all xoxo

Vintage Thursday

Today started strange but got better. For some reason neither me or Rich set our alarms last night so I woke up at 7.22 with a shit we have overslept. Now for a girl getting showered and dressed in under 15 minutes is pretty impressive. This did mean that I felt behind all day and I was all a fluster at work until I got the coffee inside me (and partially on me). The day seemed to fly by and I was busy working away all day interspersed with some chats with my colleagues. 

Unsurprisingly I felt drained of energy when I got in from work and promptly parked on the sofa and spent the evening chatting to my lovely girls Mitchy and Donna. Me and Donna have been on a nostalgia trip this evening realising we are probably the only two Jesus Jones fans in history. It's been so much fun going through old songs from our youth. It's definitely put a big smile on my face and now I'm enjoying The Big Reunion...not as good as last years but its good so far. I'd recommend if your down in the dumps start youtubing songs that make you smile and before you know it you will have a massive smile on your face!

We seem to have started something on facebook now though as I am now seeing videos from the past popping up its great thinking back to times in the past like dancing with Manda to my own worst enemy at Fusion (which became discord). I will definitely go to bed tonight with a big smile on my face!

Food wise thanks to the lovely Rich has been on plan today and has been pretty yum.

Porridge oats soaked in yogurt overnight then bananas, cherries and blueberries added.

The normal grape snack

Quorn chicken casserole thingum with my HEA of cheese followed by more fruit and a yogurt whilst I read my book.

Dinner expertly cooked by Rich orzo pasta with 75g of garlic and herb philli stirred in and mushrooms, courgettes and onions. It was gorgeous!

Supper was a sausage sandwich (7 syns for the bread and flora lighter than light) the danio and the chocolate getting me up to 13 syns for the day. 

Thats me for the evening, I'm going to finish up the big reunion then head to bed night night all xoxo

M.I.A

Sorry guys I went missing again for a few days...combination of extreme tiredness and the major CBA's hitting.  I have been getting home from work really tired so my evenings have consisted of doing very little.

Now for the honesty I have now been properly on plan since last Wednesday. Looking back at my stabby and general blah mood last week I guess I am not surprised. I have been feeling under the weather since my last cold and lacking the energy or desire to move off the sofa. I have started the day well with good intentions and then came home and oversynned or ordered takeaways. We did have some on plan dinners but then I'd eat chocolate or crisps or icecream.

It's a bit of a vicious cycle though as I feel rubbish so eat rubbish s don't want to cook but then I feel more rubbish. This feeling culminated in me going to weigh in last night as just wanted to stay in and rest. I don't like missing weigh in but I needed the rest more. I have already planned a full weekend of doing nothing but sitting, watching football and reading. Infact the only real energy I plan on expelling is shouting at the football which is inevitable when we are playing Liverpool.










So onto today you will be pleased to know the slimming world bus angel has returned despite the gorgeous smell of rich creamy donuty things behind me

I even moved my butt a bit as went to the bank with my colleague to see what the process is as I am on banking duty in a few weeks. It was quite simple....except we missed the big red arrow pointing to the drop off point. But in our defence it was a new bank!

Apart from the trip to the bank today has been good, I worked and stuff I think I am beginning to understand a few things a lot more which is good. Since I came home Ive taken Doug for a windy walk (not because either of us are windy but because its stormy outside...dont want you thinking we were parping) and then watched The Originals....I need to go to New Orleans and I am very jealous as I know a few people who are going there soon for Wrestlemania....wonder if I could hide in their suitcase.

Right onto my yummy on plan food

The normal dorset fruit with added fruit and yogurt.

Mid morning grape snack

Fake heinz soup babybels (HEA) and fruit which I nearly forgot to picture as I was engrossed in my book so you get to see orange peel and my apple.

SW chips done with BBQ frylight roasted veg and halloumi topped quorn burgers (3 syns for the burgers and extra 15g of halloumi).

The rest of my syns taking me to 14.5 for the day.

I'm going to watch more The Originals now and dream of New Orleans...may have to pull out some Anne Rice books soon.